The past week was real a testing phase for us. Kids (both under and over 6) just recovering from the  so-called ‘Aussie flu’, mummy getting into the flu, and my dear ‘macho’ husband, who is under the impression ,that hearing about his very strong immunity  against all ailments, ‘Aussie flu’ virus will flee the country forever (like St. Patrick did to snakes). But unfortunately, he proved wrong. He is not St. Patrick (the patron saint of Ireland) and the virus are not snakes.

Result: After 1 week, he got the worst flu attack in his life. I mean he couldn’t even get up from his bed without my help.

This was a hard realisation on his side. A man’s machoism can’t drive away flu viruses! He was forced to go to GP to find that his tonsillitis is extremely infected, spreading into ears and part of his head, causing him ear ache and head ache.

And now the one and only macho man in our family  is down in his bed with 39.3 deg C fever and high strength antibiotics while his poor wife is going up and down with food trays filled with kanji , hot water, flask,  black coffee, painkillers… bringing up tissues, emptying the bins.

In fact, I felt I have now three cranky kids at home. As he can’t get up from his bed, he is very frustrated. Today I had to change his bedsheet, after putting him aside, in a nearby chair, just like a rag doll.

Now somewhere I have read that, “kids can be extremely selfish”. I saw it  in front of me, this week. My two girls, especially the younger one who is daddy’s VERY OWN, ignored him completely. She won’t even go inside his room. Sometimes I had this doubt that if she REALLY forgot her dad, as he is not coming out from his room to play with her.

I remembered what my husband used to say, long time back. “There is no use in raising girls for dads. At the end of the day they will always stand only with their mother.”

**************************************

Now another first-time thing that happened in my life was my first PTA meeting, as a parent. I am the one in charge of elder’s studies, activities, Maths, English etc. As the schools won’t give homework every day , and is still stuck on reading three letter words like cat, mat, hat, pat – I buy extra books for her syllabus and make her do daily work one hour per day, in English and Maths. Oh, for that we have reward points table, and once a certain amount of reward points are earned by her, 50 cents will be going into her piggy bank.

Yesterday, Mrs Floods , her class teacher showed me all the tests and she had scored full in everything. (this is the same girl who started talking at 4.5 yrs. old and was diagnosed suspected autism in India). No words can do justice to the pride, I felt for my baby.

She can add, subtract, read, solve puzzles, ….and the girl who started  calling “mummy”at 4.5 yrs is now on the highest level (level 7) in the reading category. Though she missed one week due to flu, she caught with her gang in a day.

Mrs Floods was so happy with her academic behaviour and she told me “I know, I see you are working hard behind her progress”. How could I tell her, the feeling I felt when my first born was told autistic by a famous child neurologist, in India.

I do spelling test to her (our old dictation), completing patterns, identifying and spotting out differences etc., etc… I got her syllabus from internet and bought the whole English and Maths package.

The only thing is that she is like me, no assertiveness. She doesn’t have the guts to say NO (the most powerful word in the language).  Now I have enrolled her for assertiveness development, twice a week, provided by school and planning of making her join in self-defense classes.

Her sister will soon be joining same school this September in junior infants , and she says “I don’t WANT to go “ which seems to be her motto for everything.

This is an example of our dialogue:

M: “do you want banana?”

A: “NO, I DON’T WANT IT “(yelling)

M: “do you want toast?”

A: “I DON’T WANT IT. (again yelling)

M: “then what do you want?”

A: “I want sausage (which is not there)” ***I am getting madder***

M: “Listen Annu, now, who is the boss here?”

A: “mummy?”

M: “YES, so, whom do you listen to? “

A: “mummy ?“

M: “So, do you want mummy to get the blue stick or do you want time out, for not listening to me? “

**********crying started ********

I won’t budge.

“Now, tell me Annu, blue stick or time out?”

“Are you going to eat banana? Or there will be blue stick coming with me”

“NO…no….mummy….banana”

…………………………………………………………………………

This my daily routine with her.  Blue stick, “bossy mummy”, “monster mummy” – all combined together….

Everybody used to say terrible two’s, then terrible threes etc…. It seems like that ,in her case the TERRIBLE part always remains, even when she grows up.

Yesterday she made such a mess that out of desperation I asked her “How did you come and born in MY tummy… I wasn’t half as naughty as you. Eve my mum admits that “.

Note: so please excuse me guys, with 4 flu patients in and out of this house and the mother patient taking care of all the other…. I promise I will come with a more interesting one, next time…

Till then…. Adios ….

-Swathi Sasidharan

9 Comments
  1. Anil 9 months ago

    All the best. God bless.

  2. Varghese Plammoottil 9 months ago

    As always it was a nice piece. I do understand the sentiments expressed also. Kudos to you for your patience with your elder daughter. I am so glad she has made outstanding progress. With the little one, I am not so sure about your approach, as in spite of all your miseries, blue stick is a no go in this blue chip generation. You can try what my daughter resorts to when she gets too frustrated with her 4 year old twins and a three year old, a tiny’ mosquito’ bite!!!

    • Author
      Swathi Sasidharan 9 months ago

      Varghese uncle thanks a lot. I wont beat her . The blue stick is just a “show off”. Only timeout works with her. and thanks a lot for your good words

  3. Ajith Paliath 9 months ago

    Good writing… keep going.. …

  4. Author
    Swathi Sasidharan 9 months ago

    Varghese uncle thanks a lot. I wont beat her . The blue stick is just a “show off”. Only timeout works with her. and thanks a lot for your good words

  5. Sunil 9 months ago

    Al the best..

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