At this point, there is one more day to go, for the midterm break to end. And last Saturday something happened that, if my husband hasn’t found it at the correct time, my rebellious four-year-old Ms. Unniyarcha, would have drunk a whole bottle of perfume.

I have told earlier that as part of fight-management, and mainly due to the bullying of Unniyarcha over my elder one who is a Mother Theresa, we use British tactics. Yes – “divide and rule”. Thus, Ms. Mother Theresa was downstairs, while I was cooking so that I can have an eye on her.

Unfortunately, Unniyaracha was upstairs, under the not-so-brilliant-eyes of her dad. She considers her dad, her playmate, not as a parent. According to her only monster-mommy is her only parent.

So, after cooking lunch, I came upstairs and found our Ms was resting alone in bed, doing nothing.

*** Lesson: For toddlers doing nothing means there is danger***

But… the whole room smelt as if a perfume bottle has broken. I scanned everywhere. No bottle pieces. And then I saw. The small step stool dragged to my dressing table. Being addicted to perfume, I had various brands including the much costly Versace on top of it.

My heart skipped minimum five beats. “oh, my goodness, what did she do with it?” I am sure she took it. It is not broke because I can’t see any evidence. So…

I decided to have face-to-face questioning with the culprit.

“Did you take the perfume?”

“NO”

“I know you took it, just tell me what you did with it.”

“—-”

“Did you throw it away?”

**** only yesterday I found my sweater in the kitchen bin****

I brought her to the dressing table. Three bottles are there. I have no clue which one she took.

“Did u take this?” ** I pointed to my Roberto Cavalli **

“No”

“Did you take this?” *** At least that’s a copy perfume. ***

“yes”

I didn’t believe her, how can I?

Her previous history doesn’t mention even a single instance of truth told by her, during such damaging situations.

I asked again, pointing to MY Roberto,

“Are you sure you didn’t take this?”

“NO- err” *** this time she is also in doubt***

Then her dad came from the next room and showed me the “Christina Aguilera “without its top cap.

When he remembered that he was supposed to watch this Unniyarcha, he came to the room to find out, our Missy standing on the step stool, with my ‘Christina Aguilera’ in her hand. As she couldn’t spray, she bit off the top portion of the bottle, leaving it with a thin white tube popping up.

I don’t know if she drank it or not. Anyway, she was smelling different perfumes from head to toe. I smelled her mouth. It also smells perfume. Maybe she drank, maybe she was about to drink. Maybe she was thinking about whether to drink or not? I don’t know.

I tried not to panic. I know a panicky mom  can cause the most damage to her child. Seeing her, I realised that even if she drank, it wasn’t too much. She looks ok. And perfume is alcohol, in fact, ethanol and methanol combined.

We both looked at her for some time for any symptoms- drowsy, tired, inactive – no nothing is there.

Now there is no point in giving a half an hour lecture or five minutes timeout to her to make her understand about the consequences, to a confused four-year-old.  She is already surprised that why we look so agitated at her. I should really be blaming the parent who was supposed to look after Unniyarcha.

Anyway, by God’s grace, nothing happened, and we concluded that she didn’t drink perfume.

Now, I understood why all the liquid medicines, cleaning liquids, washing liquids  all have child-proof caps, here.

Now there is Sunday left.

Now, due to the dangerous nerve-wracking experience in Saturday, daddy dear took them both to an indoor play centre, nearby – ‘Jump 4 joy’. As the name suggests it is made to make the kids release their bundle of energy by jumping in trampolines, slides, falling in ball pit, riding toy cars etc. Two hours there and they will be so tired that, once back, after food  or maybe even during food, they will start sleeping.

Now that was most kids, but not my Unniyarcha. She will throw tantrums, scream, and finally (physically)fight with her dad when it is time to go home. So every trip back from Jump 4 Joy is accompanied with:

1. Annu’s howling /crying.

2. Her daddy warning her that he will NEVER take her there again.

3. My composed elder girl, giving me a nonstop account of what all naughty and unacceptable things that Annu did there.

At least Ms Theresa must prove us, now and again that she is the one and only well-behaved daughter we have.

The (not so) surprising thing is that if I am going with them, there will be no tantrums, no fights, no screams and my Unniyarcha will be such a well behaved girl.

Now today I had some work to do and to get some peace time, I did shopping and cooking, yesterday itself.  As I told earlier the elder doesn’t eat any fruits or vegetables. It is either rice and fish fry, or ham sandwich. But thankfully younger eats rice mixed with everything. I just mix everything in a bowl, make small rice balls and give it to her. (Back home, everyone says I shouldn’t make rice-balls as it’s a part of ‘after-death’ ceremony).

I continued to do so because I was fed like that by mom while young and nothing happened. I didn’t want to waste time running behind her, too.

So today we (Unniyarcha and me) had our lunch and I returned to work. Eventually, she got bored and went down to her dad. He was asleep in the couch.

Now this girl walks, moves like a cat (unless she is angry). So, after five minutes I heard someone slowly opening the door. Your ears must be extra sensitive if you need to sense her presence.

“Do you know what is inside this?” *** Unniyarcha in a sing-song voice ***

I looked her with blank face. *** Oh! Now what!***

“I caught a fish “

She opened a blue sock of hers, put her hand inside and took a piece of fried fish.

Seeing my facial expression change from blank to scary, she sensed that something was wrong. I just couldn’t say anything. I grabbed her hand went down and faced her daddy.

“Did you see this?”

“What?”

“Your daughter caught a piece of fried fish in her socks “

*** he just hugged her ***

Suddenly I wanted to check the kitchen. From where did have she taken the fish?  Aadu finished lunch. Rest of the fish fry is still in our deep fryer, getting the oil drained. Red lights started flashing in my head. “Danger”. I ran towards the fryer.

As expected, I could find all the evidence from where she caught the fried fish, in her socks. The purple step stool was just below the kitchen counter-top, on which the fryer was there with hot oil.  The crumbs and pieces of fish was all over the counter top and floor.

By God’s grace she didn’t knock down the fryer along with oil and fish. Now people will ask “How could you place the fryer so carelessly on counter top?” But believe me, there are four step stools in this house.

I use them to reach the top of kitchen cabinet. Seeing me do this, they use them to get things, which their height doesn’t permit.

First, it was perfume, now it is fish in the fryer.

Still we all survive…

-Swathi Sasidharan

12 Comments
  1. Jacob Koyippally 2 years ago

    “First, it was perfume, now it is fish in the fryer.” it was a bit scary though.

    DANGER..!

    • Author
      Swathi Sasidharan 2 years ago

      Jacob she has even operated ovens, washing machines and heaters….

  2. Saranya 2 years ago

    Liked unniyarcha… സൂക്ഷിക്കണം അവൾ ശരിക്കും ഉണ്ണിയാർച്ച തന്നെയാണ്…

    • Author
      Swathi Sasidharan 2 years ago

      സൂക്ഷിക്കണം എന്ന് പറഞ്ഞാൽ , എന്ത് പരിപാടി ഒപ്പിക്കാനും ഒരു പേടിയും ഇല്ല ..

  3. Jose Eddison 2 years ago

    Congrats Swathi

  4. Deepa 2 years ago

    Be careful and keep your step stools where she can’t access them, or when she drags it someone can notice it.. It’s not easy to keep an eye always on kids.. The deep fryer part is scary..

    • Author
      Swathi Sasidharan 2 years ago

      Trust me Deepa , it was scary with a S. it was good the oil has cooled off. she operates electric heaters(changes the dials to max), she operates oven,change washing machine settings. now we have disassembled the step stool. i used to hide away in utility room. but she always outsmart me in finding out hidden things…. but the elder is very responsible. she knows what to touch and what not to. but this girls knows , still she is tooo curious.

  5. അനിൽ കെ പെണ്ണുക്കര 2 years ago

    അഭിനന്ദനങ്ങൾ…

    • Author
      Swathi Sasidharan 2 years ago

      ഒരു പാട് സന്തോഷം…വായിച്ചതിന് , അനിൽ

  6. Varghese Plammoottil 2 years ago

    I also realized the fact that children just love the ones who act silly and play games with them. I also realize that it is important that at least one parent tries to discipline them, although they become unpopular with the kids. Human nature is such that even when we accept it and understand the importance of having to do this, the human in us wants to be popular also. Swathi, your transparent style is your real strength . Keep it up, and try to be as respectful to your characters as possible.

    • Author
      Swathi Sasidharan 2 years ago

      thanks a lot for your valuable comment varghese chetta. you are very true. for discipline mother is necessary . as dad see them only for a little while, he plays with them… though i may not sound respectful…. i am REALLY respectful to my kids and my husband.. thanks a lot again varghese chetta

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